Becoming A Man
by HerrelRedsgarth
Summary: A short story of a young man changing from a boy to a man.
1. Chapter 1

Today is my 18th birthday. So far, it has started out like any other day. Thomas, my manservant, wakes me up at my usual time. Getting dressed takes no time at all. Going down the long winding staircase to the dining hall, I meet only the usual staff about the house. Delicious smells are coming from the sideboard in the dining hall, and I see a huge spread has been laid out. My father must be getting up early as well. Sighing at the thought of possibly encountering him, I grab a plate and fill it up with breakfast. Taking a seat at the long, elaborately carved table, I dig in. Maria pours me ombliss juice and coffee. Smiling at me, she says, "Happy Birthday Master Herrel." "Thank you Maria." "I have a special treat for you for your lunch Master Herrel", she says, "But you can't eat it first" she scolds.

Finishing up breakfast, I race up the stairs to grab my training gear. Today, I will be getting fitted for a greatsword. Master Karl thinks I am ready to handle the weight. Grabbing my duffle I take the back stairs to avoid being seen by any of my family. My training is my one secret. I don't want to be like my brother, who spends most of his time in the pubs or hanging out with his good-for-nothing friends. Halse is my older half-brother. We have never liked each other. We have the same father, but different mothers. I was born in Elysea. My mother is the Lady of the House of Redsgarth. My father is an Asmodian Lord who has seduced many an innocent lass in his time. He cares nothing for either of us, but we are still required to obey his every whim and command.

The weapon smith shop is twenty minutes away. I run most of the way there. I arrive a bit early and only slightly out of breath. Master Karl greets me with a gruff hello.

"Drop your stuff in the corner lad and come with me." Eagerly I follow him into a smaller room where he does the measuring. He takes my measurements. He then has me handle several different test weapons. Several hours later we are finished and I'm free to go. I grab my bag and head out.

My next stop is the library. I love to come here. The age of the place, the musty scent of books is like no other. Most of the researchers here are buried in their own work. I know I won't intrude on them. I find my usual table and settle in for some quiet reading. I have chosen to read some of the old history, before the cataclysm. There aren't very many books left from that time. They are very old and fragile. Dust drifts off the covers and the pages. I turn them very carefully. I have been learning the old tongue and can read most of the book without any trouble. My peace doesn't last for long.

My older brother Halse and a couple of his friends have just sauntered in. Groaning, I look around for an escape, but they spot me before I can get up. Sighing, I wait resignedly for them to come over. They don't disappoint.

"Well, well, well, look what we've got here!"

Halse smirks to his friends. "My baby brother."

"What do you want Halse?"

"Why we came looking for you." "It's your birthday, and I wouldn't want you to spend it hiding away like you usually do." He smirks again.

"Thanks for your concern, but I'm quite happy where I am, thank you very much."

"Too bad little bro, but you are coming with us." Halse smirks again.

Grabbing me in a choke hold, he drags me out of my chair.

"Knock it off Halse!" "Leave me alone!"

"No, no, no, little bro. No can do." "We are going to show you a good time today."

"Grabbing me by the back of my shirt, he practically drags me out of the library."

Turning my head, I look wistfully back at the book still sitting on the table. The librarian will not be happy. Halse pushes me again to hurry me along my way. Gods, I really dislike him.


	2. Chapter 2

The day has passed into evening. A cool breeze is blowing through the courtyard of the Great Library. Halse is heading towards the tavern along with many other small groups of daevas. Music drifts on the air and as we approach the tavern I can tell that it emanates from the tavern. Halse slaps me on the back, practically shoving me through the door into the tavern. I stumble in trying not to run into the people in front of me. Slipping sidewise, I attempt to hug the wall, but Halse grabs my shirt and drags me up to the bar.

Halse signals to the bartender for a round of drinks. A mug is placed in front of me. It smells awful and I'm sure I don't want to know what it is. "Drink up baby brother!" Halse extorts me. Grimacing, I take a sip. Ugh, it's as awful as I thought. "No, no, no, little brother!" "Not like that!" Laughing Halse picks up his mug and tosses it back. "Drink like a man, not like a pansy!" Grimacing again I pick up my mug. I take a swallow. Fire burns my mouth and my throat feels like it will explode. My stomach is rebelling and I hope, no pray, that I don't embarrass myself by throwing up.

Halse laughs at me again and slaps my back, hard enough to shove me into the bar. "Knock it off Halse!" I push away from the bar, turning to leave. Halse grabs my shirt. "Oh no no no little brother!" "You aren't going anywhere yet!" Glancing around I note that his friends have closed in around me making escape almost impossible unless I want to cause a scene. Smirking at me Halse turns back to the bar and orders more drinks for us. He knows I won't cause a scene. Sighing I pick up my mug again. When Halse gets like this there is no changing his mind. It's better just to go along, less chance of being injured that way. I really hate my brother.

I finish my drink determined not to throw up. Another drink appears in front of me. "Drink up baby brother; you are way behind the rest of us." Grimacing I pick up the mug, hoping it's something less vile. To my surprise, this one isn't too bad. There is a stir in the crowd and I turn away from the bar to see what is going on.

The lights have dimmed and a stage in the corner appears. A woman is standing on it smiling at the crowd. She is beautiful and I'm captivated by her. The loud noise in the tavern subsides and the woman begins to sing. Her voice is...well there are no words to describe it. She has the audience in the palm of her hand. Her voice flows around and through me and I feel like I might cry. Looking around me I notice that everyone else is just as enamored of her as I am. At last she finishes singing and the spell is broken. Conversation breaks out again all around me as the singer comes over to the bar for some water.

I realize that I have finished my mug plus a few more if the empties in front of me are any indication. How much have I had to drink? Halse is speaking to me, but I can't hear him. It is so loud in here and his mouth is moving and melting... The room is moving too, and I'm not sure if I am standing anymore. Perhaps I'm floating.

Pushing Halse out of the way I look around again for the singer. I can't find her at the bar anymore and that makes me incredibly sad. I need to find her...but I don't know why.

Halse smirks at his friends. "Look baby brother is drunk". "Better get him out of here. He doesn't look so good," one of them says. "Yea," Halse says. "We can't have him passing out or worse throwing up in here".

Something grabs me by the shirt again and I am dragged out of the tavern. The freezing cold hits me like a slap in the face. My head is going to explode and my stomach is not far behind it. Halse is yelling at me but I can't understand him. There is a roaring in my head. He continues to drag me, but I've had enough. I balk, pushing and swinging at him to let me go. Pushing me hard, he stalks off saying, "Fine baby brother, find your own way home!'

I am staring up at the sky. I can see pinpoints of light swirling above me. Then the lights fade away and it becomes dark. It is cold out, but I don't even notice it anymore. Its dark here, very, very, dark.


	3. Chapter 3

Herrel! Herrel! Wake up! Wake up! Someone shakes my shoulder and shouts in my ear. "Go way" I slur, trying to roll away from the shaking. Herrel! Great gods man! Help me get him up! More shaking, then someone is lifting me under the shoulders to stand me on my feet. Come on Herrel. Can you walk? Here, help me. Let's take him to my place.

My head pounds and I think I'm going to throw up. I can hear sounds in the background and the light is extremely bright here. Groaning I roll over and try to sit up. The pain is excruciating and the world starts to spin. My stomach feels like it's on a free fall ride to the bottom of the abyss. Squinting, I look around to see where I am.

I don't recognize this room. I need to get home before the servants realize I'm missing. I can probably sneak in the back way if the room will stop spinning. Standing up I stagger a few steps towards the open doorway. My foot catches on the rug and down I go with a loud crash.

Someone exclaims in the other room and footsteps come pounding my way. Grunting, someone lifts me up off the floor and lays me back down on the cot. Stay here Herrel, at least until the hangover goes away. You've had too much to drink. We'll talk about it later. Groaning, I close my eyes and pass out.

The growling of my stomach and the need to relieve myself finally wake me up. It's evening now and the chill of the night flows in through an open window in my room. I can see a softly glowing forge somewhere down the street and the faint sounds of a hammer on an anvil in the distance. Sitting up, I look around. I'm in a small room off the back end of a hallway. Faint sounds of people emanate from the front of the building. Cautiously, I stand up. The room stands still. Thank the Gods.

At the end of the hallway is a common room. A gentle light comes from the fireplace. Two people sit at a table off to the side. I cannot quite make out who they are from my position in the hallway. My need finally drives me out into the room. Both of them turn to look at me. Their faces are both in shadow, but I recognize one of them. It is one of the warrior preceptors, Kalsten. The other I do not know. Preceptor Kalsten looks at me, disappointment and anger written on his face. He stares at me, not saying a word. I feel like an idiot and his continued silence makes me fidget with anxiety.

"Stand still boy!" "And look at me when I talk to you!" Flushing I raise my eyes to meet his. They pierce me through to my soul. I feel as though I have been cataloged and found wanting. "So" he says to me. "You are Lord Hyron's younger son." "Yes sir." "Not much to look at, are you?" "I...I guess not sir," I whisper. "I can't hear you boy!" "Speak up! And stand up straight!" Stuttering I answer, "ye ye yes sir." At that moment my stomach decides to add to my embarrassment by growling loudly. Flushing again, I look down at the floor to ashamed to ask if I can go.

Startled I jump when a soft hand is laid on my shoulder. "Leave him be Kals." "Can't you see the poor boy needs to eat?" She takes my hand and leads me over to a private alcove. "You can take care of your needs here. Wash up and then come back to the table." She leaves me to my ministrations and I am grateful to her.

*** back in the common room***

"Geez Kals what was that for?" "You scared that boy half to death. I was sure he was going to faint dead away." "Ella, that boy is a mess and it's a damn disgrace." "Do you know where I found him?!" "Lying in the damn bushes outside of Lenor's house!" "A Lords son lying in the bushes!" He gets up and paces angrily. "He's lucky I came by and found him before the guards did. Otherwise he'd be spending his time in a cell!" "Calm down Kals," she says gently. "Let him eat first then find out what happened." "Come, sit and I'll get you something to eat." She puts a soothing hand on his shoulder and plants a kiss on his head. Smiling she walks back to the kitchen to get food for her husband and Herrel.

***Alcove***

I relieve myself and wash my hands and face. Looking at myself in the small mirror above the sink I notice that my hair and clothes are totally awry. I run my claws through my hair, trying to straighten it out some. Wiping at my clothes I straighten those as best I can as well. Taking a deep breath I walk out and back to the common room.

Preceptor Kalsten looks up as I enter the room. He waves me over to the seat across from him. I take a seat, afraid of what he will say to me next. A young lady comes in laden with plates of food. My stomach growls again, and I flush with embarrassment. She places them on the table and Kalsten indicates I should help myself. Taking a plate, I fill it. Head down, I slowly begin to eat, not sure how my stomach is going to take food. Kalsten watches me, not saying anything for a few minutes.

"Eat boy. You are going to need the food and drink. You are dehydrated and hung-over." Blushing, I continue to eat slowly. So far my stomach hasn't disagreed with me. Thank the Gods for that. After we finish eating and the plates are cleared away, Kalsten leads me into his study and closes the door. "Sit down boy, you and I are going to have a talk." Sitting down behind his desk, he looks at me gravely. "So, tell me how you came to be laying in the bushes outside of a ...'House of ill repute?" "A what?" I ask confused. "I found you outside of Lenor's house." he says. "She has a bad reputation boy, and you have no business being there!" "I um...I ah...don't know who that is." "You reek of it boy, so I know you were in there!"

Hanging my head again I said, "I just don't remember." "I just...I just want to ...go home," I whisper. "Too bad boy!" he says. "You can't go home in the shape you're in!" "You're a mess!" "If any kid of mine came home looking like you, he'd not sit down for a month!" Looking up at him I said, "My father doesn't hit us." "He won't even notice that I'm gone." "He won't be home anyway." Sighing, I lean back in my chair. Memories flow over me as a small child trying to get my father's attention and getting brushed aside.

"I hear you want to be a gladiator?" I jump at the change of topic. "Yes...yes sir...I do." "Not much to you," he leans back in his chair musing. "Are you serious about this boy?" "Yes...yes I am sir." He looks at me considering. "Becoming a gladiator is hard work boy." "Your time won't be your own." "You'll work from sunup to sundown." "You'll not be allowed a moments rest." "No drinking, no whoring, no whining." Indignant I sit up straight. "I don't do those things!" "Oh really," his voice drips with sarcasm. "I'd call you a liar boy, if I didn't already know your history." "What happened last night!" he barks.

"It was my birthday. My brother and his friends dragged me out to a tavern." "I didn't want to go, but you don't say no to Halse, not if you want to keep living pain free." Kalsten snorts. "Go on boy!" "They just kept buying me drinks, and I guess...well I've never drunk before." "I don't remember much after that." "Just arguing with Halse, then hazy flashes of ...ummmm." Blushing again, I fight to keep those memories hazy. I remember female laughter, perfume, gentle hands pulling at my clothes. I remember...I blush to remember...warmth, pressure, release; then more female laughter, then falling. I sit there quietly, furious with myself for being so weak.

"So..." Kalsten drawls. "You remember enough to be ashamed. "Good boy, good." "You're less likely to be that foolish again." Taking a piece of paper, he writes something on it, and then hands it to me. "Be there at 0500 sharp boy!" "Now, get out of here!" "Go home and sleep." "It's the last good night's rest you're going to get." Taking the paper, I get up to leave. "Yes sir."


	4. Chapter 4

My lungs are burning, sweat is dripping into my eyes, and hair is straggling down my back. Gods I can hardly see anything. I want to collapse but I keep struggling on. Today we are running up the path to Alukina's Palace, with 100 pounds of armor on. Our gladiator trainer loves to find these horrendous paths for us to run up. This is my third week of training. Our group consists of 25 recruits. Most of them won't make it. I won't be one of those that fail.

Preceptor Kalsten arranged for me to join this group. He warned me it wouldn't be easy; that I'd be pushed to my limits and beyond. I didn't believe him then, but I do now. I've never been as exhausted as I have these last few weeks. I just fall into an exhausted sleep, only to get up and start over the next day. Breakfast is a hurried affair with no time to sit over a nice cup of tea. Every morning we run wearing heavy armor. Then it's drilling with weapons. We get to eat a quick lunch, and then it's off to strategy planning, then more running, then more classroom time. Missing a day of training is not acceptable. Several recruits have already dropped out or been kicked out.

******* 6 months later

Our class is down to 15. Today we get to work in Altgard. There are several groups of Lepharists that have moved into the area. Our job is to remove them from the fortress area using any means necessary. Hopefully they go peacefully. Most likely they won't. I don't like the killing part. It seems like a failure when you resort to killing.

I've put on weight and bulk. None of my clothes fit anymore. I feel so much stronger.

******* 1 year later

Our class is down to 8. We are slowly being whittled away. Today is my 19th birthday. I don't get the day off from training though. While eating my breakfast, I remember where I was one year ago. I was sitting in the library hiding from my half-brother Halse. How things have changed. I am nothing like the person I was back then. I've put on 30 pounds of solid muscle. I easily outweigh him by at that much if not more. He still hangs out with his good for nothing friends. I rarely see him anymore. He and father had a tiff and he has moved out.

Father himself is not in residence either. He is on our country estate doing gods only know what.

I am glad he isn't here. He doesn't know about my training. He would forbid it, I've no doubt. Tonight the guys are taking me out to the tavern for cake. I don't drink anymore (since that night) but I can't turn down cake.

****** 27 months later

Today is graduation day. There are 7 of us left. I made it! Our graduation gift from the Masters is a full set of plate armor. I haven't been able to take my eyes off mine as I eat breakfast. This moment has been a long time coming. All of the struggles and hardship have led to this moment. We will receive our assignments this morning. I can't wait to see where I get to go. My dream has come true. I am a true gladiator.

A knock on the door jerks me out of my daydreaming. It's a shugo with a message for me. I pay him and look at the parchment. Slowly peeling the wax seal off, I open the parchment. It's a message from High Priest Baldar. I am summoned to the Great Temple immediately. Another knock on the door comes and this time it's my old Preceptor Kalsten. He looks very grave.

Herrel, he says. I have come to escort you to the Temple. "But sir", I protest, "what about the graduation ceremony?" You won't be attending that ceremony Herrel. "What?!", "what do you mean?" "No questions Herrel just come with me."

Puzzled I followed Kalsten burning with questions but knowing to keep silent. Shortly we arrived at the Great Temple. There were many Archons lined up along the pathway to the High Priest. Curiously, I looked over at Kalsten. "It looks like some ceremony is going to occur" I whisper to him. He nods at me. Come Herrel. He leads me around to the back of the room where the High Priest was quietly talking. Turning Baldar notices us. Ah Herrel, here you are. Welcome Daeva. I gaped at him. Wha...What? I glanced over at Kalsten again. He just looked at me with that grave look of his. The man never smiles. Yes you Herrel. Congratulations. He laughed at my puzzlement. Ascension is not always a dramatic event. Most don't even notice it unless they are in a battle for their lives and don't die from a normally fatal wound. But enough of that for now. I am in need of your services Herrel, but the proprieties must be met first.

He glances at my dress. Yes yes, that will do fine I think. Shall we begin then? Kalsten? If you would do the honors. Kalsten takes my elbow and leads me out into the Temple to the carpet. When beckoned, walk down the carpet isle and kneel before the Priest. He'll do the rest.

And so I became a Daeva of Asmodae in service to the High Priest Baldar. I was just turned 20.


End file.
